days like these...
its on days like these that i just want to run away into the world. leave everything and everyone i have behind me. its days like these that i want to break free and just go, with no heads up, no warning - nothing.
nothing is stoping me from getting up and walking away from this computer, and just walking out the door. nothing is stopping me. and i think thats why i don't leave. its the fact that nothing is holding me here is infact whats holding me here. ok, now i lie, everything is holding me here. holding me here and not letting me go, but its days like today that i wish it wasn't true. i sometimes wish that nothing was holding me here. i don't know. this is just a bunch of nonesense coming out of the mouth of a girl thats just so tired, so sick and tired of it all. i just want this all to go away. i want this all to end and be done with. but it never is, and it never will.
what's stoping all of us from leaving our lives behind and just starting fresh? what's stoping us from saying this is the last string, i've had it with this chapter of my life, and just getting up and leaving? why do we go on with all the pain and anger and complaining and just everything? why don't we all just start fresh, and keep starting fresh until we are truly happy? you know even if one day you are ready to leave and you tell yourself nothing is holding you here, there will always be something. there will always be something holding you here and not letting you go.
as for days like these, well we can all have dreams. we can all dream that we are far far away. no one can take your dreams away from you...so keep dreaming you were somewhere else.
nothing is stoping me from getting up and walking away from this computer, and just walking out the door. nothing is stopping me. and i think thats why i don't leave. its the fact that nothing is holding me here is infact whats holding me here. ok, now i lie, everything is holding me here. holding me here and not letting me go, but its days like today that i wish it wasn't true. i sometimes wish that nothing was holding me here. i don't know. this is just a bunch of nonesense coming out of the mouth of a girl thats just so tired, so sick and tired of it all. i just want this all to go away. i want this all to end and be done with. but it never is, and it never will.
what's stoping all of us from leaving our lives behind and just starting fresh? what's stoping us from saying this is the last string, i've had it with this chapter of my life, and just getting up and leaving? why do we go on with all the pain and anger and complaining and just everything? why don't we all just start fresh, and keep starting fresh until we are truly happy? you know even if one day you are ready to leave and you tell yourself nothing is holding you here, there will always be something. there will always be something holding you here and not letting you go.
as for days like these, well we can all have dreams. we can all dream that we are far far away. no one can take your dreams away from you...so keep dreaming you were somewhere else.
5 Comments:
so what is it that is holding you back?
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hmm...what is it thats holding me back? you know when i first looked at this question i thought hey thats a pretty easy question to answer, but now that i am here and ready to respond, i find it rather hard. i don't know why, a normal person would find it pretty easy...but i'm a bit different.
ok...well i think what's holding me back is all the people i have in my life - my friends, loved ones, people i truely care about. another thing thats holding me back is i'm scared to just get up and leave. i'm scared to go into the world alone and start over. think about, and i mean really think about it, wouldn't you be scared too?
Yea, yea. What is holding us back? I've considered this so many times and now I'm considering it again. Shakespeare said that the world is a stage and we're merely actors on it; so then, can't we play the role we choose? Why not get up and go? Why not step onto a highway, hitchhike across the continent, bum enough money for a ticket to Ghana or India or London and start a new life?
I almost left after high school. Almost left after freshman year at university. Now I'm finishing up my sophomore year and have put the plans to the back burner: I'm not leaving till after I graduate. Doesn't all this planning take all the spontanaiety out of it?
I think the reason we don't want to leave is simply that we're afraid of succeeding. What if we get to India and meet a friendly man who offers us a job, who offers us room and board, who offers us friendship? And what if we meet that someone and get married and assimilate so fully that we don't actually ever have to stop traveling: we can live in a new nation and never go back home. Well... never go back to the old home. I want to go, but I want to have to go back to Seattle. Why? Because if I do succeed, then I break all the constraints of society. If I end up happy without taking the path society has laid for me since birth, then society was wrong about my future. Society was wrong when it told me I had to be a rich, popular businessman in order to be happy. And if society was wrong about that, maybe its wrong about everything. If culture crumbles, then I have no paradigms with which to judge the world, and I've no foundation. I'm lost then. Scary.
i think that your point on leaving and succeding is bad, i think that the reason we leave is to find better.
i would hate it is i left and found out that there is nothing out there for me, and then having to return back and get on the rollercoster once again, from the beginning. for me its the not wanting to lose what i have because if i leave(and i want to) and i don't suceed, then i'll have to come back a failure, with nothing.
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