good-night

i found that conversation i had with you that one night where i was a bit more ballsy than usual. the conversation where i put myself out there and in return i got nothing but the promise that you'd call the next day. the conversation where i acted totally out of character, where i don't even recognize who was talking, even though it was me.

i read the entire thing, because you see i saved it on my email account. away from wandering eyes...away from people who shouldn't be reading things like that. why did i save it? well i'm not entirely sure, but i guess i just wanted to remember it? i wanted to go back one day (like tonight) and read what i wrote and what was said and how you said it?

i'm glad i saved it. i'm glad i was able to go back to that time. to that night before i headed out for the pub...that last conversation, that last thought, that last outbreak before you go out and drink and dance and push it all out of your mind so you can release yourself and let go.

i think i just might delete that right now...let it go...throw it in the trash so to speak. do a bit of summer cleaning.